Two boys are playing football in Golden Gate Park when one is attacked by a crazed dog. Thinking quickly, the other boy rips off a board from a nearby fence, wedges it down the dog's collar and twists, shutting off the dog's breathing. A reporter who is strolling by sees the incident and rushes over to interview the boy. Noting the boys had been playing football, he starts writing in his notebook, Forty Niners fan saves friend from vicious animal. But I'm not a Niners fan, the boy replies. Oakland Raiders fan rescues friend from horrific attack, the reporter starts again. I'm not a Raiders fan either, the boy says. Then what are you? the reporter asks. I'm a Cowboys fan!!! The reporter starts a new sheet in his notebook and writes, Little redneck kills family pet.